HollyKing's Journal

Folks, I am here to warn you of a very serious evil. One that is right under your noses in that bastion of American culture, the shopping mall. I hear you ask what about the mall can be evil about the mall. Let me assure you that there are many evil things that lurk in the bowels of those gleaming corridors. Today I want to bring your attention to the terror of Build-A-Bear Workshops.

I know you don’t think Build-A-Bear can be a place of horror and I used to be just like you. I would walk by and see all the happy children coming out with their new bears. It would make my heart warm to see the joy on their faces. So I decided to go in and watch the magic as it happens.

As soon as I walked through the door I was shocked by what I saw. Not shelves filled with with stuffed bundles of joy as I expected. Friends, instead I saw barrels filled with the hides of those poor little animals. Above each there was a representative of the species below. Held there by straps to peer down into the pelts of their brothers and sisters below. Let me tell you that I almost ran from the very place, but I steeled my nerves as I had to continue to see what other monstrosities were ahead.

The next abomination was worse! For what did I see but a clear box with filled with the bowels that was being whipped into a fluffy cloud before my very eyes. I couldn’t believe it but there it was in front of me. The deranged people that ran Build-A-Bear had captured wild bears, stripped them of their pelt and callously tossed their insides into this repulsive mixer.

Just when I thought I had seen it all a little tyke and one of the workers approached. I watched as the worker took a plug off of a pipe coming out of the vat. The worker took the bear from the child and jammed it onto the pipe. Stepping on a pedal opened some valve inside the machine and the viscera flowed into the bear. There wasn’t any thought given to putting the proper insides back into the bear. He was filled with the bits from tigers, triceratops, ponies, monkeys and other bears.

Can you see the horror of this my friends? Can you see that we need to save these poor animals? These little friends who help us when we’re hurt. They never judge us. They never scold us. They never poop on the carpet. They don’t turn green and stinky if we forget to feed them. They deserve much better than this from us.

We must make a stand and rescue them! We must give of ourselves to those who give to us! I ask you to join me and rescue a bear from this purgatory. Give a tiger a home full of love. Help a monkey forget having his insides sucked out and being tossed in a keg to wait for someone to love.

Following the tradition of naming my system after bears I've named my new PowerBook Tornassuk. According to the Polar Bears International fact page folks in eastern Greenland call polar bears Tornassuk.

I recived two calls this morning about jobs. Both are for 6 months or so. The problem is that one is in Bellvue Washington and the other one is on the east coast. They both sound interesting and it looks like I'll make some nice bank if I take the east coast gig. I just don't know if I want to be away from hollyqueen and my friends that long. At least I'll be able to come home each weekend if I take the Bellvue job. I put in my resume for both of them. Let's see what happens.

PS: Damn LJ and their default of auto formatting!